It's all about the detail...

Never before have the details in life seemed so noticeable to me. In almost every aspect of my little life, these details appear; that bit extra that makes something special. I have a friend who always says 'it's the detail!' when we shop for clothes. I am always the one looking for the best leather, the quirky detail, the right buttons.

Natalia Vodianova via a taste of blue

In motherhood, I see it's those little details that can make the day go more smoothly. Where I have have their favourite cakes as an after-school snack. At home, the meal that happens effortlessly but is made with the best ingredients and goes all to plan. The patience and coaching as I sit with them to do homework. I am noticing that given the time and pure dedication, it is possible for me to provide all of those little details.

Historically, I have always had a quiet awe for women who manage this. They are a certain type who are able to constantly stay one step ahead. When the children were smaller, these mothers were the ones who would (with a swish of a perfect ponytail) serenely draw out a nutritious snack and drink, where I would have forgotten mine and my toddler would have to chew on their own hands!

But...and I wouldn't be me if there wasn't a but...what is it all about?! Never before have I had the time or the inclination to be so bothered with these little details. Instead a perpetual inner dialogue in my head raged; always justifying why I couldn't make the perfect meal/be the best mother I could be/have lipstick and pretty dress on as my husband returned at the end of a busy work day. I railed against being too organised. But now I begrudgingly admit I judged those women whose day consisted of little else but managing these details. And look at me now; pot calling the kettle black.

There is a hint of Stepford wife-dom in my life at the moment, as I sense that I am subconsciously trying to make up for all my past wrongs. But the point is: they weren't wrongs exactly, they were just less-thans. I did less than I could have done, as I put priority into other areas; like time for myself or for my job.

via nantucket youth

I do enjoy the little details and it's a quiet thrill now to be able to provide them for my family...but I do wonder if it's unsustainable. All of this 'thinking' time is about me trying to establish how to live a life that does not burn the candle at both ends until everything is, frankly, well, extinguished. I read a book that is shiveringly accurate in its depiction of 'perfect' motherhood and its darker side. It's called 'This Perfect World'...and I have to say it was disturbing reading; for the degree to which I identified with these über mothers.

I know to some readers this will seem like an unimaginable depth of navel-gazing. But I find myself really questioning these elements of life at this time.  We only get one chance at this; what is the best way to choose to live your life? Constantly striving for perfection or content with what you have? 

I am thinking the best place to start this fundamental life pondering is with a cuppa tea and a good book; I'll let you know if I find the answer but until then...

Who do you read?

I started reading blogs first...then I found myself wanting to leave a comment so I set up a blogger profile. Then I wanted to write, so I set up a blog. Then I made some blog friends so then I started to follow them. Then I started to follow others and others followed me. I spent a fair amount of time scanning around for new and exciting blogs and got to the point where I almost stopped reading the written word anywhere else. Magazines and newspapers became defunct; I got more immediate and wide-ranging enjoyment from blogs. Blogs were, and still are, the finger on the pulse. Most often I start sentences by saying 'I read somewhere...' and I realised I had read it on a blog.

if I were to partake in Manolo's; these would be them...via dustjacket attic

And so now I am an old hand. I have my favourite bloggers and I religiously follow them and love when the hit the 'post' button. I miss them when they go on holidays or take a break. I find myself wondering how they are, if something has happened that they have shared detail on. Similarly people leave me comments expressing the same sentiment about what they read on my blog; for example one friend saw Olivia P on TV and it made her think of me! (Love that) How funny and charming. It seems that there are things that are 'so Lou' that people associate with me.

via style me pretty

But I realise I have become somewhat stagnant with my reading. I think it's probably time I caught up and found some new places to visit.

Can you share any blog recommendations?

Which is your favourite blog? 
Which one do you rush to?

Which blog has the best writing? 
Which has the best images?

So c'mon share with me...won't you?

what a smile...via dust jacket attic

Things of beauty...

Friday comes...a much-needed end of the week. My children have now broken up from school (again) and we have two week's of half term. As ever, the reprieve from the school run routine is greatly appreciated, but also there is that mild panic at the prospect of entertaining them. Must children be entertained constantly? I'm sure when I was a child we entertained ourselves more!

I read back on my blog this time last year and recognise a different me. What a difference a year makes; I was Lou but not the Lou I am now. It's subtle, but to me, very clear. Life is a journey and this particular phase is one of self-awareness. I've been too busy to notice very much of anything for years and now; well now I notice everything. I am acutely conscious in a new way. It's really good, enjoyable, informative.

So, the lovely Simone came to tea. And lunch. And we had cupcakes (well, why not?). There was a-l-h-o-t of talk, we covered many topics, time flew by and then away she went back to the big city! What a miracle the Internet is to bring friends to our doorstep. I never ever would have even met Simone unless I had done so through blogging. Who would have thought? A kindred spirit found out there in the wilderness of the web.

Longing for some quieter time this weekend. There is this danger of over-egging the weekend activities, leaving us drained by the time Monday rolls around. I'm still learning to find that balance; to live life at weekends but also to allow us to recoup as a family.

A whimsical grey and pink hue to my beautiful things this week...

via the front row

by Atlanta Bartlett

colours I love via JCrew

ohhh I like...the Mulberry Polly Push Lock

...impossibly pretty...Natalia Vodianova

striking eyes...photograph by eddie judd photography

the best things in life: tea and cake...photograph by Philip Webb

frilly skirts are lovely via bob and blossom

via Vogue Chanel Spring Summer 2012

Daddy is home; The Kennedy's...photograph by Jacques Lowe

via the front row

Wishing all of you lovely readers a happy weekend.

Order...

Why does it matter that my life is ordered? All week I have been clearing the decks at home; emptying cupboards and clearing drawers. There have been a few prompts for this activity. Firstly: making it count. I am not at work at the moment, but will be going back at some point. I figure I should to make the most of my free days and get my life well and truly sorted. Secondly there is a sartorial prompt. I have trawled through my wardrobe and I have ditched anything that I have not worn for a year. This cull has been rather satisfying. All of the 'what if's' and 'maybe...one day's' have been discarded and I have sunk to the depths of the oldest hoards of clothes and have said 'goodbye'. On the advice of my lovely sister in law, I make an exception for dresses; which I keep for Boo in the hope that one day she will want to sport the vintage look. When and if she does; there will be dresses.

Country Living

The final reason for the semblance of an ordered house is the visit of my friend Simone, whom I am collecting from the train station tomorrow morning!! Whaaaaaat??? A never-before-clapped-eyes-on blog friend! Beyond excited.

...vintage Vogue

The result of this life laundry is contentment. There, I said it. I am one of those people. I like the order - no, more than that; I need the order. It makes for a simpler day. Things are where they should be. I am replete. They say life is about the simplest things, and for me this is one such thing. If I could bottle this feeling of order and save it for a later date, I so would.

Country Living

A day spent...

A day spent. School drop off. After I went on a long run - using my favourite and most relied-upon route. I run around the roads where I grew up (one advantage of living in the same town for over 30 years; I know the way everywhere). I passed the theatre in my town where they were unloading sets. I passed the University and observed students piling in for their lectures. I ran on; pondering the days when I used to go to lectures, my attendance usually prompted by my friend Nikki, who was way more conscientious than I and could probably still recite our English Literature timetable, even now. I passed my doctor's surgery, then my childhood home, through the avenue of chestnut trees, leaves and conkers crunching underfoot.

via crush cul de sac

Home. A dog walk with my friend and new doggie partner-in-crime (she has my puppy's sister) around the fields. We discussed the single-worst-ever dinner party she attended at the weekend. Why would a host say the attire is 'informal' when she herself opens the door wearing a cocktail dress??! Nothing worse than turning up under-dressed.

Osteopath visit. My pain issue still not better, oh how I wish it were. It's very, very slow progress. I am developing patience unlike I have ever exhibited before.

A condensed shopping trip to salve my frustrations...where I purchased a short skirt not dissimilar to one I owned when I was 19. Is this a sign?

via crush cul de sac

School pick-up and home again. Homework hour. Where I established that I really can not do maths. English however; I managed.

A part showing of the film 'Mary Poppins' before their bed. A spoonful of sugar, helps the medicine go down.

Bubble and Squeak for dinner, as is Autumn's tradition. A Sunday roast must be followed by a Monday Bubble and Squeak. It is the law of our house.

And so my day was spent. You know how people ask: can the minutiae of someone's day really be of any interest to the masses? I do consider when I write this; really, who cares? But then I think of that line in 'You've Got Mail' and my small life...so good night, dear void!

Things of beauty...

Thankfully it's Friday! This week has seen a flurry of appointments for me; taking me from one thing to the next, the week has flown by. It seems the more time I have, the more I fill it. It was my husband's birthday mid-week and poor thing had to leave the house at 5.30am to go to London, so no traditional family birthday-present-unwrapping for him. The children missed him completely and he's been away since. Looking forward to his homecoming later and a night out with friends. I am much in need of some friend time; I feel I am literally submerged in domestics at the moment. Yet again I realise afresh how much work full time motherhood is. Maybe a relaxed latte with work colleagues seems rather enticing afterall ;-)

The poignancy of blogging struck me this week when I saw that one of my first ever followers, Vibeke has very sadly passed away. Even in the short time I have written my blog, I have made genuine friends and as the months passed I noticed Vibeke was commenting less, posting rarely. It's always such a shock to read bad news on a blog; it's with such sadness as I absorb the passing of blogging friends. It feels like we've lost one of our own. I know there are many that remember Lisa in the same way.

And so to things of beauty...an autumnal feel as the season finally turns for good. I had the Rayburn fire lit this week so the kitchen is now toasty for the puppy. He seems quite pleased. Have a lovely weekend...

...an arch-browed Kate Moss, photograph by Mario Testino for UK Vogue

I'm really feeling this at the moment - I have some old friends who I feel I have not seen lately...we have scheduled a date in November!

chairs that I love....via molin y molinette

photograph by aaron delesie

photograph by trevor hoehne

LOVE the boats....photograph by Simon Brown

'...wrapped up with string, these are a few of my favourite things!' Boo has been singing this for her play audition...

via inspired joyful chaos

...ohh Olivia P...would you mind being me for a day, so I could be you?

order makes me happy...jars via 79 ideas

I get my longed-for nights out this weekend...

two of them! 

On with the heels and dress!

Today's thoughts...

I'm sure there are much better things to be doing than sitting here writingthis. It seems no matter how productive my plans are for a day, thatday arrives and I don't get as much done. I tell myself this is the newme; if it doesn't get done, it's OK. Go easy on yourself!

via this flickr

A country walk this morning with the pup. Yesterday itwas the beach, where I discovered that he knows his name but sometimeschooses not to respond to it! I am doing my best with the puppytraining but it's hard; just when I think I've cracked it, he remindsme that he is just a baby and is learning all the time.

photograph by aaron delesie

In recent months, my daughter Boo has been unsettled; at times to an alarming degree. I am so grateful now that she seems calmer. She is so diligent with her school work; so keen to please. In fact both of them have this innate need for reassurance and praise. This is, I assume, as it should be and those assurances are given daily, but still it seems there is always scope for more. I am trying hard to provide her with consistency and a regular rhythm in life, in the hope that it will give her confidence and surety. I've come to accept that some children need routine to thrive...

Meanwhile, yesterday my son had to have his hair cut; this is always a trauma for me as there is a Samson-esque quality about his hair. It is so him. His hair is his strength. He has blonde-tipped curls that I just adore - his hair is like a hit of mummy pheromones to me. So I stood by watching them tumble as his hair was cut and it is just a little too short. It'll grow...

The weather seems to have turned and we are back to some autumnal norm. I survey the apples fallen from the trees in our garden and wonder for the hundredth time - what am I going to do with them all? There is only so much stewed apple one family can take...so it goes in my country life.