Senin, 07 Februari 2011

Baby day...

I am an Auntie again! My latest nephew (I now have three nephews and two nieces) was born late last night. I am so proud of my lovely sister in law who is literally like the little sister I never had. A baby boy to start their family tree. Wonderful, wonderful news.


Over these past weeks as her pregnancy has progressed I have found myself thinking back almost 10 years to the time when I had Boo; my first born. It's with mixed feelings that I remember this time, as although of course we were overjoyed to have our baby, her coming did change me - and us - forever. I was on cloud nine when she arrived, but then, for a short time after, the rain come down and it took me a while to get myself back afterwards. Now as a bystander to another family growing, I find myself conflicted; half wishing I could have my time again and to re-write it with the life experience I have gained now. I was too young then, too unsure and with simply not enough life experience to see through the fog of those early newborn weeks and months. But equally I look back and see how much I learned from those times and how much clarity I have found from having children.

via are so happy
I am right where I want to be and for all the challenging, sleepless times of looking after a young baby, I am now replete with my family. My children are and will always be the single most important, most inventive, most vital thing I ever did - we ever did. I entered the room of motherhood and closed the door and whilst over the years there have been times when I have peeked back through that door to my life before...my main direction of view has been forwards into this ever-expanding room of motherhood, where daily there are experiences and visions of experiences that confirm; I am in the right place.

And just for good measure, a favourite scene that never leaves a dry eye...from 'She's having a baby'.

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